Ten Steps for Adult Children Caregivers to Follow After a Holiday Visit
Sheri Samotin, President
LifeBridge Solutions, LLC
Marina Del Rey, California
An ElderCare Matters Partner
Many families take advantage of the holidays to enjoy time together. While these visits can range from fun to extremely stressful for all sorts of reasons, one common outcome is that adult children who haven’t seen their aging parents in a while to come away with feelings of surprise, fear, shock and even anger. Aging parents often do an excellent job of “hiding” their declining physical or cognitive abilities from their kids, especially when those kids live far away. They do this for a range of reasons – from not wanting their children “in their business” to denial that there is a decline or even the cognitive inability to recognize it. If you’ve recently returned from your holiday visit and find yourself in a bit of panic, here are ten steps to follow to get on track.
While each of these steps can seem overwhelming, if you try to tackle them one at a time in a logical order it will be much less so. You may find that you need to do a “deep dive” into one of the steps; if that’s the case, try to assess whether you should stop everything to do so or whether you should simply put that step in the “parking lot” and come back to it after you have moved through the others. Finally, remember that any plans you make and implement will need to be revisited from time to time as your parent’s needs or resources changes.
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